Disclaimer: These charas are not
mine. They belong to Ms. Constantine. No harm
intended...much.
Warnings: AU, sap.
Pairings: Pellaz/Calanthe/Caeru,
hinted Calanthe/Caeru and Pell/Rue
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Two months after
Feybraihatide, Caeru contemplates the new life he
has been given.
Beta: As before, unbetaed. All
mistakes are mine.
Spoilers: All six books.
A/N: Ok so I lied. Scar 'Verse
isn't done...it's only just beginning! Cross posted
to my LJ, raythoo LJ comm, and the Wraeththu Yahoo
Group. Feedback is appreciated!
'thoughts'
The sounds of hara enjoying the
night life floated up to Phaonica as Caeru stared
out from the window seat that he was sitting on. A
soft smile of contentment tilted his lips up as his
hand stroked the soft mound his belly had become
over the last two months. He was very close to
dropping his pearl, he knew that much, and it filled
him with anticipation and happiness, not like the
last time. This time, he knew that both of his
consorts would be involved with this pearl and
nothing would keep them apart.
Thinking over the last few months,
Caeru couldn't help but sigh in happiness. Calanthe
had succeeded in healing him, but the final healing
moment had been on Feybraihatide when he and Pell
had created this pearl. It was almost even more
sacred and powerful since it had been on the night
when such powerful energies had been in the air.
Even remembering that night made him shiver with
longing and amazement.
Since then, Pell and he had begun
healing their own time worn scars through their joy
over what had been created. It was as if they were
giving themselves a second chance where they hadn’t
with Abrimel’s pearl. He had even nudged Cal with
the idea of finally giving Pell a pearl, but they
had yet to follow through on that. He had a feeling
they also had some things to work through, but he
knew that he would help them no matter what. He
loved them and knew that they returned the feelings
now with very little bitterness or regret.
Smiling sadly as he thought about
the cause of that regret, Caeru looked down at his
belly and sighed softly. Loki and Darquiel had also
become very involved with his carrying this pearl
and Caeru knew it was only a matter of time before
they had more grandharlings. The thought filled him
with a mixture of joy and sorrow even as he thought
of his and Pell's grandhar Geburael. He looked so
much like his father that it was painful sometimes
to look at him and not long for his son, Abrimel.
A gentle hand brushing away his
tears startled the Tigrina from his thoughts and he
looked up into Pell's concerned gaze. "Rue, what's
wrong?" Pell murmured gently as Caeru turned his
cheek into the gentle touch.
For a minute, Rue felt his lip
wobble a bit on his emotions as he remembered how
even this touch had been absent from his life until
recently. He reached up and cupped his shaking hands
around the tender hand as he nuzzled it. He didn't
say anything as Pell sat down next to him and let
himself be drawn into his consort's arms as he
breathed deeply in an effort to not cry. It was a
joyous time, not one to be filled with painful
memories.
But he could feel Pell's concern
even as the other har stroked his back soothingly,
so finally he whispered, "I wish Abrimel was
here..." He had to give Pell credit that he didn't
say or even do anything harsh in reaction, but he
still felt his consort's body stiffen at the mention
of their son. "I know...that you are still angry
with him, but he's still my son. Our son. I wish he
was here so we could be a complete family," he
explained softly and couldn't stop the sob that
trembled from his lips. He buried his face in Pell's
shoulder as the Tigron relaxed under him and held
him soothingly. He knew that Pell wouldn't say
anything, but it was out there now. Caeru didn't
blame Pell...he just longed for them to all be happy
and together.
He melted even more as strong
fingers ran through his hair, massaging his scalp
while another body fitted itself behind him. Cal was
there, he knew that, and it made everything just a
bit better. The warmth between them served to relax
him and he didn't stop the smile that formed when
their hands came to rest on his swollen belly. It
was a loving touch, something he'd craved for so
long and now had. And the best thing was that he
didn't feel desperate to keep hold of it. He knew
that it was there to stay and that alone made him
the happiest har in the world.
His blissful moment though was
shattered as he gasped in sudden pain when his
stomach rippled sharply. Their holds instantly
became protective as they whispered their concern
when he curled in over his pearl. He cried out as
another contraction hit him and he knew that it was
time, but he couldn't find the breath to even speak
the words much less relax enough to move. He didn't
have to worry though as they both seemed to get it
and Cal scooped him into his arms while Pell ran to
get the healer. Caeru wrapped his arms around Cal's
neck and whimpered as he was hit with another
contraction, trying to remember if it had been this
bad with Abrimel. He remembered the pain, but it had
taken quite a while for him to drop the pearl of his
first born. This one seemed intent on beating that
record as the contractions came swiftly in
succession. He found himself stripped somehow to
just a shift and screamed in pain as the
contractions became so intense that his body was
curled in sharply. He was gathered into powerful
arms and looked up blindly into Pell's worried gaze
and that dulled his pain for a moment before another
bout hit him.
The contractions seemed endless as
he labored to drop his pearl, but both of his
consorts never left his side and kept a hold on his
hands and himself the entire time. Finally, with a
grunting scream, he pushed the pearl from his body
and sagged against Pell, gasping for air as he was
wiped down and covered in a thick fur blanket. He
reached out blindly and the pearl was placed in his
arms and he couldn't help smiling as he felt the
powerful pulse of life from within. This harling was
indeed a blessing. With a smile, he fell asleep,
curled around the pearl under the warm blankets. He
didn't see the fond looks his consorts had directed
at him nor did he feel them curl around him and the
pearl protectively after the healer had left. But he
didn't need to see them to know their presence and
relaxed even more in sleep.
*~*~*
"Are you sure he's going to be ok?
He's been out for a day now."
Loki's soft inquiry woke Caeru up
and he chuckled as he curled more around the pearl.
He heard his name being whispered in relief and
smiled up at Loki and Darquiel, who were on the
bedside watching him worriedly. "I'm fine, you two.
Come to see your brother?" he teased them as he
shifted into a more comfortable position.
"And you, silly Caeru," Loki
chided before leaning in and pressing a kiss to
Caeru's head.
"Pell and Cal had to go and make
an announcement about the pearl and they had to take
care of some stuff, so we thought we'd stick around
in case you woke up," Darquiel explained when Caeru
glanced around for his consorts.
"Ah, makes sense," Caeru murmured
fondly as he reached for his other son. His smile
turned gentle as Darquiel took his hand carefully
and held it close to his heart. "How long did
everything take?" he asked as he then took Loki's
hand into his. "And where is Geb?"
"Geb's with Cobweb and Snake. He
knows how much he looks like his father and didn't
want you to be hurting again when you saw him," Loki
explained quietly, though his eyes were sad when
Caeru looked up at him in surprise. "But he was
worried...you labored for five hours. And it was
intense, Pell told us. Something tells me that this
harling is going to be a match for Darq," he added
and grinned as his half brother socked him on the
shoulder.
"Behave you two," Caeru teased
good naturedly while stroking the pearl. "It won't
be long till we see what this one has in store for
him. I'm glad you both are here. Please tell Geb
that I'd love to see him too," he said as he smiled
at the two younger hara before him.
"Honest?" Loki asked doubtfully
and Caeru's smile was sad this time.
"Honest. He may look like Abrimel,
but he's all I have of my son. I would like it
greatly if he would be here, in only that I don't
want him to hate me as well," Caeru explained sadly
and looked down as a tear rolled down his face.
"No one hates you, Caeru," Loki
cried as he hugged the Tigrina tightly, careful
around the pearl. Darquiel nodded silently as he
watched solemnly, and then went into the hug when he
was tugged in.
"Thanks, Loki..." was all Caeru
could say as he hugged the two who were his
children, whether by hosting or raising.
The next few days passed slowly
for Caeru, but comfortably. He was usually with his
pearl, but his consorts took their turns in holding
the pearl so that he could freshen up and move
about, stretching healing muscles as they watched
him and the pearl. He also had many visitors,
whether family, close friends, or some of the
members of the Hegemony. All of them wanted to see
the miracle pearl that had been created when no one
had thought it would happen again for Caeru. Caeru
was grateful and happy to see everyone, but his
heart was still sad when the one har he wanted to
see never could come.
He was thinking about Abrimel as
he stroked his pearl one day, about a week after
he'd dropped. It had become almost a constant
thought on his mind since this was his second
harling with Pell as the father and it was bringing
back many memories. Things were, of course, very
different from that time since both Tigrons were
with him, but it still was something he thought
about. He sighed softly as he rested his cheek on
the softened shell. The little one would hatch soon
for sure and he honestly couldn't wait. But another
part of him was afraid that this little one would
look like Abrimel and he didn't know how he'd react.
A soft sound at the doorway
alerted him to another har's presence and he looked
up with a welcoming smile. But his smile froze as
his breath caught in shock when he saw who it was.
Pell was there, but next to him was who had captured
his gaze as Abrimel smiled a bit next to his father.
"Abrimel..." Caeru managed to whisper as he sat up
and reached for his son, who strode instantly into
the room.
"Caeru...I've missed you so much,"
Abrimel whispered and Caeru sobbed as he gathered
his son to him when Abrimel sat on the bed. He
couldn't believe the peace and happiness that was
all but radiating from his son, but it didn't matter
to him how it came to be. Nothing mattered as he
held the har he had hosted so many decades ago and
who he had thought lost to him because of Pell. Now
it was as if things had come full circle and were
healed. He could handle everything that life threw
at him from then on with his consorts and harlings
around him. And that was all that mattered.
It seemed that the harling felt
the same as they heard a soft crack. As one, Caeru
and Abrimel looked down in surprise as Pellaz came
over to the bedside and they watched in amazement as
the shell cracked and a hand pressed out. Caeru
reached out and let the small hand grab his finger
before another hand poked out and pushed the shell
apart further, cracking the shell into smaller bits.
Caeru smiled brilliantly as the harling looked up at
him knowingly before he gathered the newly hatched
harling into his arms. He cuddled the harling and
smiled in joy up at Pellaz and then at Abrimel.
Nothing made him happier than being with his family
and Caeru knew that his scars had healed completely.
The End