Title: And So the Leaf Falls. Pt. 17/?

Author: Deathangelgw

Author email: deathangelgw@hotmail.com

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Tolkien, not me. Though I wouldn’t mind them! ~_^

Warnings: AU, slight OOC, sap, angst, dark, lemon/lime, slash.

Pairings: Elrond/Legolas, hinted Erestor/Glorfindel, Ereinion/Celebrían, Elladan/Haldir, and Elrohir/Rumil

Rating: PG-13

Summary: A time to explore finds new things for a certain Mirkwood prince

Notes: After a long hiatus...*now* they talk. Thanks for the reviews and to MA thanks for the beta! Love ya! Enjoy! Feedback is much loved and appreciated!

‘thoughts’

Six months. Six months had passed since his world had ended. Six months since he had listened to his golden leaf...his beloved...speak the words that had sundered them.

“I am not ready to leave Arda!”

Elrond sighed softly as he closed his eyes, shutting out the world around him that seemed to mock him with its brightness. He leaned his head against the cool marble and took in the soft sea breeze that blew in through the window from the ocean. He could hear the light calls from the seagulls and the distant sound of waves hitting the shore from where he was staying in a villa not far from the harbor at the Grey Havens. The longing to leave briefly welled up inside of him, but he ignored it as one would a fly. They were to leave within the next two days once Galadriel and her troupe had arrived, but it seemed as if they would never leave these forsaken shores.

Since leaving Minas Tirith after Legolas' confession, Elrond had put as much as he could into readying his sons in taking over the fading Imladris, for they were staying in Arda until Arwen and Elessar had passed on. It seemed as if he was going to be leaving for the West alone, much as he had started Imladris alone. For some reason, that thought was the hardest to take and wasn't even assuaged with the other thought of finally seeing his wife after all these centuries. It was as though everything had died within him with those fateful words spoken by the golden haired leaf who had taken his heart again.

'Should not have opened up to him. Why did I let myself fall in love again? Am I cursed to be eternally alone for all I love fall from me?' he thought to himself in despair as a tear rolled down his cheek, though his face showed none of his pain. 'First Elros, then Ereinion and Celebrían. Now my beautiful daughter Arwen and Legolas, my golden leaf...all of them leave me. Perhaps I should indeed choose to not be with anyone again,' he concluded and placed a hand over his face as he trembled with his unending sorrow.

"Ada? Why do you look as if you are grieving?" (Father)

Elrohir's gentle inquiry broke through his thoughts and Elrond looked over with a faint smile. He held his hand out to his youngest son and clutched weakly at the strong hand that laced with his own while his son came over to his side. Elrohir gazed at him questioningly, obviously intent on knowing the answer to his father's pain as he sat next to Elrond on the windowsill that overlooked the shore. Elrond turned his face away even as he stroked his son's hand, absorbing the warmth within the strong fingers that would disappear in two days' time. Another tear rolled down his cheek at that thought, but it was gently wiped away, leading him to look at his saddened son. "Ada...your heart is so heavy and your spirit so dim. What is grieving you so much? Why is Legolas not here?"

At the mention of his beloved leaf, Elrond felt his heart clamp down hard on the bolt of pain that shot through him and he looked away sharply. "He is not coming. He is staying in Arda until Elessar has passed," he bit out coldly, but his voice was quiet as the words floated into the air. He didn't look to see his son's reaction, already knowing that there was shock there.

"Why? Why would he do such a thing?" Elrohir demanded and it almost warmed Elrond to hear the anger within his son's voice, but it didn't last as his heart froze over once more protectively.

"He gave his word while they were in Moria. Such an oath is binding," Elrond explained sarcastically, his voice all but dripping with the sarcasm, but it didn't make him feel any better, so he just numbed himself more to his pain. Wearied, he rested his head on the sill again. "Why do all I love leave me?" he wondered aloud in a whisper.

"Ada, do not say such things!" Elrohir cried as he gathered his father to him, but he trembled as he felt how cold his father had become. Elrond couldn't find it within him to care anymore as he just rested numbly within his son's arms as it all sank in. Not even the thought of seeing his wife thawed his heart enough. It had just been too much.

The days passed in a blur for him as he prepared to set sail, obliging his worried sons and advisors with his presence, but not even really acknowledging them as he sat before the fire, trying to feel warmth again. He noted Galadriel's arrival with the Galadhrim, but he pulled even more into himself when he noted how happy his sons were to be around their chosen. After that, he stayed in his room until the last call for departure was brought to him and he left with the others.

His farewells to his sons and advisors were perfunctory and short, though he did hug his sons a bit longer as it finally crashed onto him that he wouldn't see them either for another century, if not more. But he was a bit heartened with the thought that they *would* be coming. With a final press of his lips to their foreheads, he boarded the ship waiting to take him across the sea to the West.

He was just about to go below deck as the crew made their preparations when he heard a commotion on the deck. "What in Elbereth's name are you doing here?!" Elrohir's snarled question caught his attention and he went to the side rail to stand with Mithrandir to see what was going on. His heart caught in his throat when he saw wildly flying golden hair and a pair of wide desperate blue eyes facing off against stormy grey blue eyes as his son faced off against none other than Legolas himself.

"Let me pass! I will not let him go without speaking with him!" Legolas demanded as his hands clenched into shaking fists at his side.

"You will go nowhere near him, faithless and oath breaker!" Elrohir spat out as he swung out at his once friend and sent the stunned Wood Elf to the pier.

"Elrohir what is going on!?" Elladan asked as he grabbed his brother and held him pinned while Haldir and Rumil grimly helped Legolas to his feet.

"Tell them, Legolas! Tell them how you broke Ada's spirit and heart by making an oath to Estel! Tell them how you would rather stay here than be with the one Elf who was supposed to be your soul mate!" Elrohir snarled in rage as tears streaked his face. Legolas trembled before him, unable to even defend himself as the others stared at him in shock.

"Enough, ionen. Enough," (my son) Elrond said quietly as went down the plank to stand on the pier, facing them. He drew himself up as Elrohir straightened and was guided to the side by Elladan as they watched their father face his lover. Elrond gazed at Legolas and felt the ache within him surge, but he shut it away and buried it, becoming calm and cold. "What is it you want, princeling?" he asked quietly, though he was heard over the waves crashing barely, but none could miss the coldness within his tones.

Legolas swallowed hard as he stepped forward, but then he stopped and hung his head. Elrond felt sorrow well up in him and was unable to stop it as Legolas remained silent, obviously unable to speak of whatever reason he had come. With a trembling sigh, Elrond looked away as well and went back onto the ship, unable to tolerate anymore pain. He had a feeling that this was truly the last straw that broke his back as he felt himself grow even colder and more cut off from the world.

The final call was given for them to depart, but Elrond couldn't bear to watch his home disappear from his sight, so he started towards his room below decks, ignoring the ones who called him friend. But just as they were about to leave the pier, he heard his name shouted and looked over and was caught instantly in Legolas' fiery gaze. He trembled slightly as he saw the conviction, love, and desire within those blue eyes and his soul reached for it before he put a wall up.

"Elrond! Hear me! I will find you! We will be together and I will spend the rest of eternity with you at your side!" Legolas shouted at him as the wind whipped up and began carrying the ship away.

But Elrond found no heart or solace in this for he had none as he stared back at Legolas. Without a word, he turned and went below decks, where he stayed for most of the journey West. As the days went by in their travel, he grew thinner and paler, almost frail as he faded from his heartbreak. He barely acknowledged Galadriel or Mithrandir when they visited with him and kept to himself mainly.

On the day that Aman was sighted and they docked, he quietly went out onto shore and found himself enveloped in strong arms. He looked up and into Ereinion's eyes as the other Elf held him close. "Ereinion," he managed to whisper before he was pulled into another comforting hug. He felt his heart thaw just a bit as he stood within his King and very brief lover’s arms. But it went cold again as he just stood in the hold before he was released and his eyes were searched once more.

Ereinion frowned darkly as he gazed into Elrond’s eyes. “What happened to you, meldiren?” (my dear friend) he whispered over the crowd that was around them. Elrond looked down and away as he stepped back, but he didn’t go far as he was gathered into another hold, though not as encompassing. But the warmth within it was the same as Celebrían held him tenderly, tucking him close as he brought his arms up to hold her a little. Ereinion wrapped his arms around them both as the crowd surrounding them helped in unloading the ship.

After a while, Ereinion and Celebrían led Elrond to the town and the house that they were staying at, not really speaking in respect to Elrond’s silence. Once there, they led him inside and took him to his room and sat him down before sitting next to him. Celebrían cupped Elrond’s cheek tenderly and urged him to look at her. He gazed at her dully before saying softly, “You two are together now I am guessing.” She blinked and flushed, confirming his supposition and he managed to muster a sad smile. “I am keeping you. Please go,” he whispered and stood, leaving their hold.

“Nay, we are not going,” Ereinion stated angrily as he stood and grabbed Elrond’s shoulder before tugging him closer. He wrapped his arms around Elrond’s waist and held the younger Elf to him in a tight hold. “What has happened?” he whispered fiercely as he rested his chin on Elrond’s shoulder.

“Do not say ‘nothing’ Elrond for we two know you the best of anyone!” Celebrían added as she came around them and completed the Elrond sandwich. “Yes, Ereinion and I are together. He came to me when I first arrived and with our mutual love for you we found love together. We had hoped to share in this with you, but something tells me that other things have happened,” she said quietly as she wrapped her arms around them both.

“So tell us what has happened,” Ereinion stated clearly as they watched the impassive Peredhel.

Elrond stood there quietly for a while, not responding to them or their questions as he tried to find the strength to reply. Finally, he looked up and gazed at them. “I found out what true loneliness is and why people can die from it,” he answered quietly before pulling from them in their shock. “Please leave me. I wish to be alone,” he whispered before going into the bathing room and shutting the door firmly. Slowly, he slid down the door until he was sitting on the ground and rested his head on his hand. He couldn’t feel anything anymore. He had fought, and fought, and fought, but in the end, he had lost. His daughter was doomed to the death of the Second born, his sons, while not lost, were not coming to Aman for a long time. His wife and his beloved King were now lovers and most likely mated or at least it was in the plans depending on how he reacted. Of course he would step aside so that they could have happiness. It was the only thing he could do.

Leaning his head back, Elrond finally let the tears that had threatened all those months ago to fall as he realized he really *was* alone. He sacrificed so much, but in the end, all he had sacrificed for with his family and people was for naught. In the end...he was alone.

‘Legolas...why did you leave me?’ he wondered bleakly and sighed as he fell asleep, too exhausted to stay awake any longer.

TBC

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